After over a decade of parenting, I’ve learned that it ebbs and flows. But teaching my third child to ski? It was different. I enjoyed it more. I felt stronger and more confident. And I savored every minute with my little guy.

When I taught my first, I had been snowboarding for over 20 years. I wasn’t even sure I could remember how to ski, and that was nearly a decade before. Now, I mostly ski, and in the past few years, I’ve built my confidence. Strength training has made a difference, and this time, I fully enjoyed the experience.

As I reflected on this past ski week with my kiddos, here’s what teaching my third to ski has taught me about parenting.

Ski Parenting Lesson #1: Embrace the Falls—Growth Happens Outside of Comfort Zones

You never know if you are pushing a little too much, but if you aren’t, then you’re not trying hard enough. I loved every minute of taking my son up the bigger runs so he could see the animals in the adventure park and take advantage of his fearlessness. But then, out of nowhere, he caught an edge and fell hard. I maneuvered my skis over him, and he was upset, covered in snow.

Instead of focusing on the fall, we embraced and talked about how falls are part of learning. With my first, I would have avoided these moments, but now I see them as necessary growth experiences. One tumble over the course of 90 minutes didn’t define our day—our wins did.

Pro Tip: Listen to Ep 212: Mindful Mom Revolution—How You Can Rewire the Brain for Better Health.

Ski Parenting Lesson #2: Embrace Help—Outside Instruction Can Break Through Barriers

Even though I’ve taught two other kids to ski, my experience has shown me that my children behave differently for someone else. I hit a standstill with my third when it came to getting him to ski independently. But after a private lesson with an instructor, something clicked—he was ready to stop clinging to my legs.

The truth is, we can push our kids only so far before outside help is needed. And that’s okay. It’s good for them to learn from others, and it gives me time to enjoy my own turns. Parenting is about knowing when to step in and when to step back.

Pro Tip: Listen to Ep 217: The Superpower of Perseverance—Serena & Lily co-founder Lily Kanter shares how she leaned on her village to raise her three kids.

Ski Parenting Lesson #3: Give Kids Autonomy—Children Thrive with Guided Independence

My middle child, who I usually hover over, is finding her stride in skiing—especially when I step back and let her choose her own way down the mountain. Family ski days require coordination, but I’ve learned that letting my kids go their own way or splitting up is part of the experience.

Now, I trust that my older two will find the best path for themselves. It’s a delicate dance of stepping in and backing off, and I’ve realized that letting them navigate on their own—even if they fall—helps them grow. More often than not, the worst-case scenario we imagine is far worse than reality.

Pro Tip: Listen to Ep 318: BabyQuip’s Mother-Son Founding Duo—How delegating leadership to her son helped their multi-million-dollar family business thrive. You can also read up on what I learned at Parent School, which is that letting go of control helps to build on kids’ self-esteem.

Ski Parenting Lesson #4: Physical and Mental Preparation Matters

Strength training as we get older gets more and more important. Without strength training, we can lose up to 30% of muscle mass between 50 and 70, and on average, we lose 3-5% per decade after 30. It takes concentrated effort to maintain muscle, which builds our endurance and helps to mitigate the natural evolution we might be feeling. I used to struggle for energy down a run, and now my energy is as endless as my kids. Moms, grab those weight vests, get your steps in, and work to lift as heavy of weights as your body can handle weekly.

Pro Tip: I’ve broken down my favorite moves for 20 minutes of movement if that’s all you’ve got in a given day, and Peloton can also tailor to the time you have available for a quick class.

Confident Kids Require Sturdy Leaders

I’ll be honest—most of parenting has felt like winging it. I’ve taken what I loved from my own childhood and worked to rewrite what I didn’t. But by my third child, I finally feel like I’m hitting my stride. Accepting that there is no perfect formula—and embracing both the highs and lows—has been a game-changer. An attitude of gratitude also pays in spades.

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